“Omg! He’s such a fuckboi”. “Men never tell me what they want”. You hear women complaining about this “fuckbois” a lot. But is it actually as bad a thing to be a fuckboi as women make it sound?
The answer might surprise you: Not only is it a GOOD thing to be a fuckboi, but it’s actually the most ideal archetype for a dude who’s trying to bang more girls. In fact, even if you’re thinking, “No way, I want to find a good relationship,” it’s STILL better to frame yourself as a fuckboi than it is to come off as a provider early in your interactions with women.
So, why is it beneficial to frame yourself as a fuckboi? And more importantly, how do you do it? That’s what the rest of this blog post will focus on.
Why It’s Good to Be a Fuckboi
If you’ve ever known a fuckboi, you’ve probably noticed that they do really well with women. In particular, they are good at getting women attached. Girls get super obsessive and psycho around these guys. Ultimately, they hate these guys because they don’t understand why these guys can command so much power over them.
The name of the game is misleading. Even though these characteristics I’m going to describe are different, they have a very common theme. Whenever a woman encounters a fuckboi, she often doesn’t know for sure that he is a fuckboi: she can’t tell if he is actually a cool dude and if he actually likes her. These questions in her head are the ones that draw the girl in. It’s also why the women end up losing their shit with fuckbois: because she’s confused and needs reassurance almost constantly.
So, what is it that fuckbois do differently (other than having a high SMV and confidence of course)?
Just like everything, there’s the Good, the Bad and the Ugly that fuckbois do. You have to aim to embody all the “Good” and be aware of the “Bad” and the “Ugly”. Your goal isn’t to become an asshole, abusive, or to treat women like shit. But there are traits of fuckbois that, if you can adopt into your own game, will make you more successful with women.
6 Good Things that Fuckbois Do (That Regular Guy’s Don’t)
- Confidence: The big dick energy (as women call it). The almost delusional mindset that they can achieve anything they put their mind to. This is why you hear stories of some really hot girls sticking with a guy who was a bum – because their confidence was quite attractive.
- Fun and take nothing seriously: Fuckbois take nothing seriously. Not even the girl. No matter what shit they throw at him, he just brushes it off. The only exception? When the girl intentionally disrespects him. Fuckbois won’t stand for this. They’ll call it out, and as per the point below, they’re willing for her to walk away as long as it means standing for their principles.
- Calling her out and willing to walk away: “Hey. I’ll be honest. That behaviour doesn’t fly with me”. They are willing to drop a girl at the drop of a dime. Why? Because they will never allow a girl to walk all over them. This makes them even more attractive in a girl’s head.
- Good in bed: Fuckbois are known for their good dick. They always deliver and that’s why girls wait around to be called at their beckoning for a 2am D appointment. The frame is explicitly set for sexual encounters. By keeping it strictly sexual, girls start to develop feelings at times because of the room fuckbois leave for the girl to chase.
- Unpredictable: The girl never knows what the fuckboi is going to get them to experience. It’s not just physically, but mentally she feels a certain type of way as well. This energy really gravitates women to him and is in turn makes him very preselected and desired by many.
- Emotionally unavailable: Fuckbois are not emotionally available and this drives girls crazy. The average guy gets super needy quickly, which turns the girl off. But if you do the opposite of needy, girls get confused and again start chasing. However, if you show absolutely 0 emotion toward the girl, she will lose interest, because she does not want to be used just for sex. So, fuckbois will on occasion show a softer side to balance it out, while also giving the “feeling” to the girl that he may be emotionally available in the future.
4 Bad (& Ugly) Things that Fuckbois Sometimes Do
- Love bombing: Fuckbois gather information about what makes a girl specifically tick. Information like relationships with parents (in particular, her father), along with her past partners. They use this to find patterns and then give validation where she craves it. Like for girls who need a strong male figure in their life, they might say, “I’m proud of what you did there”. They know the girl will be hooked to that because she likes to make their parents proud.Likewise, a fuckboi figures out what was missing in the girl’s previous relationship and actually does the exact thing in an exaggerated way. For example, the girl could say “I loved him but he was not ready to settle down”. Fuckbois would subtly indicate that she has a future with him, saying things like “We should totally go on a trip together”, “I’m sure my mom would love you”, etc. This is all done in an exaggerating tonality but the girls will pick up on it at face value over time. Even go up to saying the magic words in a joking form “I love you”, “I’m going to fall for you, aren’t I”, and that sort of thing.
- Validation stripping: Fuckbois will start off with being nice and very nurturing/caring to the girl. But they’ll do so without creeping into the needy category. So for example, asking her to text when she reaches home. Saying that he’s excited to see her again, sending good morning texts frequently… and then, over time, he’ll change up this behavior. The girl expects a good morning text but he won’t send it. This ends up driving her up the wall, and when she asks him about it, he’ll say “I’ve been busy. But I think about you”. Over time, this will turn into things like cancelling plans on her at the last minute. These things really drives the girls crazy, because they are craving that initial validation the guy gave them at the beginning, and they end up chasing to get it.
- Manipulation & investment: The reason I categorized them together in this context is because fuckbois get girls to do things for them, and then they gradually increase the quantity and size of the things they ask for. For example, it may just start off with the girl buying them coffee. Over time, gradually gets to dinners once a week, then her cooking for him, cleaning the house, etc.! At some point, the girl does not even realize that she does a lot for the guy without her even realizing she is not getting much in return because it was all done so smoothly.
- Gaslighting: I saved the biggest one for last. This is one hell of a tool but also extremely toxic, bordering on abusive. To put it in layman’s terms, gaslighting is when someone does something wrong and doesn’t own up to their mistake but blames it on you.You may have seen women do this when they’re caught cheating: “I cheated because I felt neglected”Gaslighting examples include saying things like: “I didn’t actually know that we were exclusive tbh. I thought you wanted it to stay casual” or something as small as “I thought you just needed some space” when you were the one who mini ghosted her for 2 days. This behavior is confusing and the emotions it can cause draws the girl in a lot more.
Caveat of being a Fuckboi
There’s one caveat that Alex & I have learnt about being perceived as a fuckboi. An average girl is going to fuck you on the first date (if you still use good game) and with a guy she does not perceive as a fuckboi, she will take her time to fuck you on the 2nd or 3rd date. She might even go out of her way to show her “good girl” side to you so she can present herself as a relationship option as well.
Let’s say you are perceived as a fuckboi and you don’t end up banging the girl on the first date, majority of the time, you will NOT get a second date. She will quickly backwards rationalize that you’re going to be a viable dick but nothing more. So, she will look elsewhere since she is not that invested anymore (sex didn’t happen)
What You Can Learn from Fuckbois
Learning how to incorporate fuckboi elements into your game is key to growing your game because these are the guys who bang hot girls all the time, and keep those hot girls coming back for more. To help you truly understand the fuckboi mentality, we’ve broken down all of the major traits you see among them.
However, your entire game journey should be to aim at getting all the “GOOD” stuff down to a tee. The bad & the ugly are for informational purposes. We’ve intentionally categorized them as bad and ugly because they are not good traits to embody. We do not believe a healthy guy who is successful with women should or needs to embody these bad or ugly traits. These traits can truly fuck up a woman, when your goal as a strong man should be to leave women better off.
By having authentic confidence, not taking things too seriously, not standing for bad behavior, working to get good in bed, being somewhat unpredictable, and not being too emotionally available, you will find yourself attracting more women and keeping them around longer.
Indian “It’s not you, but it’s me” PE.