The Biggest Dating App Mistake Men Make (And How to Avoid It)
What is the biggest dating app mistake men are making?
When it comes to dating apps, there is one mistake I see over and over again. Even amongst guys who are pretty good. It is a lack of screening. They try to make it work with every girl and ultimately wind up frustrated, because you’re not gonna be compatible with most girls.
The solution is proper screening. Let me elaborate:
Why should you screen girls?
Even the best dating coaches know they can’t make it work with every girl. So they usually don’t put themselves in situations where the odds are stacked against them. This is called screening, and it is a crucial part of game that often gets missed
The advantage of not screening is that you will get more matches and more dates, but some of them will be a frustrating waste of time. Even worse, you will inevitably miss out on some girls that would’ve been a much better fit and led to a more successful outcome
Simply put, if you don’t screen, you are going to waste a lot of your time on dates that were never gonna go anywhere and become frustrated.
How to screen?
Step 1: Screen with photos
There are many different types of screening. Let’s talk about how I do it. First, I recommend having a semi sexual profile. If you’re in good shape, this usually means a shirtless photo. Here is one I’ve been using for years
This photo is my second pic on Tinder and Hinge (Bumble doesn’t allow it), and it works wonders. It screens out some of the really prude girls or the ones who are just looking for a simp to take them to dinner. The girls who are left are generally at least somewhat dtf. So any date I set up is more likely to close.
If you are not in good shape, you might wanna skip this step entirely. You will still be able to screen in other ways
Note: I’m not as jacked as I look. Getting a good pump beforehand, along with good lighting, can make a massive difference in how muscular you appear. If you are in decent shape, go to the gym and do a good workout along with some crunches and pushups right before you take the photo. It REALLY helps
Step 2: Screen with your bio
I recommend making your bio at least somewhat sexual. Guys are sometimes afraid to do this, because they think they will eliminate all the “quality women”. This is incorrect. Even the women who are great relationship material can appreciate a bit of sexuality if phrased correctly. The exception being the prudes, who you don’t want in the first place
Here is an example of the bio I use on Tinder and Bumble
There is definitely a lot of screening happening here, but it is done in a tongue-in-cheek sorta way, so it’s not cringe. In addition, there are a LOT of “hooks” here. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had a girl message me, “I think I have your weaknesses.”
This bio can also take a DTF girl and make her direct all her attention towards me. Remember, you’re competing with a bunch of guys, and having a bio with many hooks can give you the edge you need to ensure she’s going home with you, not someone else
You can always make your bio slightly less sexual, but don’t remove all sexuality. Otherwise, as I said before, you’re gonna be going on a bunch of dates that are a waste of time and actually miss out on girls with whom things would’ve been much better
Step 3: Screen Over Text
There is definitely A LOT to go over here. Check out this guide for more detailed info on how to sexualize your texting. My favorite way is actually pretty simple: you just invite a girl straight to your place for a drink. If she agrees to come over, then you know she is dtf. Real-life example below
Some girls, though, will ask to meet in public. That is fine too, you can say “yeah sure we can meet at a bar nearby first”. Thus, setting the frame, if things go well, you guys are going back to yours
And lastly, some girls will ghost or tell you they are no longer interested. That’s totally ok, you just screened out a bunch of girls that were never gonna go back to your place in the first place. However, if you’ve been screening via the first two steps I mentioned, then you should encounter very few of these
Conclusion
As you can see, screening is crucial to your game. All the best guys are doing it in some way or another. So don’t be afraid to eliminate girls who are prude, entitled, or overly demanding. If you have good photos, you should have more than enough volume coming in anyway. If you’re interested in learning more, check out this guide on how to text girls.
