If you’re like me, you’ve probably run into challenges at times with texting girls and keeping the conversations fun, interesting, and not boring. After years of working at getting better at this, I can do it basically on autopilot. I don’t have to think much to come up with a line. But, I’m going to try my best to put into words what I’ve learned over the years about banter and attraction on Tinder.
Obviously, girls are often likely to flake if the conversation is too boring and not engaging enough for her. You also can’t go too far in the other direction — you can’t be over the top witty and all over the place. You want to find a subtle yet calm balance. Rule of thumb is you don’t have to keep texting a lot to set up plans, but it’s always good to know how much value she sees in you. Value = more likelihood of her seeing you (3rd grade mathematics :P)
Before I share my 3 best techniques to attract a girl on Tinder (and other dating apps), a caveat:
You have to keep in mind that if you’re at a beginner or intermediate stage of texting, you may be reading non-compliance or compliance wrong. If you think she’s showing disinterest by answering you in one word, like “Okay” or “Yes”, but has been texting fine before that, it’s still not non-compliance. You should get a collection of consistent non-compliance before you decide to ponder how you’re going to build value.
The same applies with compliance. If she sends you a big text just one time, do not convince yourself that she is very interested in you and that you can go in for then kill and soft close. More often than not, you will come across as eager and you will lose the girl.
Look for a collection of compliance or non-compliance pattern before you go one way or the other.
Ok – so without further ado, my top texting techniques to build attraction with a woman!
1. Difference between being too witty and subtle fun:
When a girl asks you “where are you from?” in the first two sentences of the interaction, do not go corny and say “Heaven. I was sent by God” or any other version of that. You could go one of 3 ways, “From India. What about you?” (Basic yet to the point) OR “India. Moved here for my business. What about you?” (DHV and a hook for her to bite on and ask what kind of business) OR “India. Moved here for my business and Hailey (her name) of course ;). You?” (My personal favorite).
You need to be able to find a balance between being too gamey and too logical.
Take another example:
She asks you “what’s up?”.
Do not go Corny Carl mode and say “Looking for a basinet for our future newborn. And you?”.
You could again go either way and say “Finishing up some work emails. You could be my distraction ;)” (Fun and sets the sexual frame subtly) OR
“Chillin on my romantic balcony. Sipping wine. What about you?” (you could further use this to soft close for the straight to the house date)
2. Introducing Role-plays/ Themes
Role plays are a great way to spice up any interaction since it solidifies the “we” frame of Tinder flirting plus opens up the conversation and her legs like flood gates. This also serves the purpose of giving her an emotional roller coaster since you’re bouncing between being genuine and playful/fun
Let’s take an example.
She: “Where have you traveled before?”
You: “South Africa, Colombia, Europe. Had to travel all over to pick the perfect sport for our honeymoon of course”
This is the famous marriage role play but you could easily take this to soft closing about a certain wine you two like or a netflix movie you two could watch as saying “This is going to be our movie”
She: “What are you upto tonight?”
You: “Taking a break from fighting crime. Sipping wine. What about you?”
Superhero theme where you could introduce your super powers being booty massage and oral orgasms giver. Even making jokes that Morgan freeman is the narrator of your backstory.
AND another one (D-D-D-Deejay Khaleed):
She: “What are you upto right now?”
You: “Cuddling with my black cat. We are exchanging our best booty encounters”
Indicating that you have a pet who shares your mutual inclination towards booty
3. How to turn around non-compliance
Ever been frustrated by girls giving you one word after one word for replies that you want to just choke slam your phone Undertaker style? Don’t fret, I’ve been there too. And after multiple failed trials, I came up with a simple formula to try and baby step intrigue and sexualize. You could literally use it as a script for when a girl says anything from “Good”…all the way to “Nice”
This works well when you haven’t soft closed yet or made plans to meet. All you have to say is
“I know what else is good” to her reply of “Good”
She: “What is?” (Obviously)
Now, you could just leave her hanging or turn it into a soft close by saying
You: “Our romantic date of course”
She: “Oh. Is it?”
You: “Ofcourse. I even have a plan”
She: “Tell me what is it?”
You: “It’s a little PG-13. Can you handle it?” (Subtle challenge plus riding on that intrigue wave)
You: “You and me grabbing wine. Cuddles, neck kisses, whisper cute stuff to each other. I’d grab your face by gripping your hair. Get it close to me and only let our lips touch but not kiss. You’d beg for it. To feel that kiss. I won’t let you“
She: “Wow. You won’t let me huh?”
You: “Only if you ask me nicely ;)”
She: “Why is that?”
You: “I’m a big tease and you’ll find out soon enough the other ways I tease ;)”
She: “And when will I find out”
You: “On our romantic date of course”
She:”When is that?”
You: “What days are you free next?”
thinks to himself: Did I just soft close and sexualize on myself? 🤔
Pretty simple. If you stop getting frustrated at some responses women give you, more often than not, you will come up with golden gems like this yourself. This particular script has been run through and iterated more times than Tony Stark did to discover Time Travel in Avengers
Turning around non-compliance for soft closes is a whole different ball game and I will definitely get into that more in detail in one of my next articles
Hope you guys found this valuable and if you have any questions, don’t hesitate to comment below.
“Thank you, Come again!”
– Indian PE