Let’s be real: one of the most frustrating things about texting a girl from online dating is knowing whether she actually likes you. Ever thought to yourself, “Why does she not just say she likes me?”. Or, “Why can’t she just say ‘Hi, can we please fuck?’”.
Some girls might say something like this, but with the overwhelming majority, you really have to read between the lines. Remember, girls communicate at a subtle emotional level and we men are more logic based. So, as a man, you’ve got to be able to tell when a girl is subtly communicating that she wants you to make it happen (“it” meaning a date, and then sex).
Notice how I said “wants you to make it happen”? The girl will give you cues, you have to pick up on them. Then, your job is to lead making plans and handling objections (if any) that come up. You lead. She follows. Simple math. Think of it as she is throwing you some bread crumbs and you’re picking them up while she’s standing at the end of it with a loaf of bread….naked of course!
At this point, you’re probably saying, “This all sounds great, but how do I know when she likes me?” So in the rest of this article, I’ll be going through some of the key signs that help you tell if a girl likes you over text.
4 Signs of Attraction from a Girl
I myself would categorize these signs of attraction, or what we sometimes call Indicators of Interest (“IOIs”) into 4 areas. Whenever I see signs of one or more of these, I can tell she is interested in me and it might be time to try to get her to agree to a date. The math is simple, the more she likes you or the earlier she shows you interest, the more she is invested and the more she will be compliant to make plans with you (and not flake).
1. Compliments: You know how girls hate nice guys who over validate them? It’s the opposite when girls do that to guys. They’re doing that as a way to show interest. It’s important to catch onto this quickly, as otherwise the lack of picking up on her social cues can actually cause loss of attraction.
2. Long texts/qualifying herself: This is a great sign of a girl being invested in you. If she is qualifying herself (proving herself to you), then she is subconsciously telling herself, “Hmm. I must like this guy. I’m sharing a lot about myself already”. This is a more obvious one but always be careful to not go towards the platonic interview style questionnaire.
3. Double texting: Girls try their best not to get rejected. And they always choose the path with least resistance since rejection can take a toll on them. Especially since they have a bigger ego than we usually do. So, if they’re putting that on the line and double texting you, you definitely know it’s on.
4. Baits to sexualize: This is specifically one where the sexual close/fuck date close is initiated by the girl. That’s why we highly recommend adding sexual hooks to your bio. For example “Expert cuddler, great oral skills, dominant”. If a girl specifically catches on to this, it will be smooth sailing from there on out
Examples of Women Expressing Interest
It all sounds good in theory, but what do each of these look like? I’ll walk you through them with examples:
- He cleverly baited that he’s cooking food shirtless and she wanted to check him out. “Oh dang” (Compliment) followed by “You should send pics” (Double text in a matter of 4 minutes)
- The key is to also move it forward with starting a roleplay of you cooking pasta for her and her massaging your abs in exchange
- Or you could even use this as a segue of “You can take a thorough look at the pasta in person on the date””
- She remembers that they’ve matched before. This is after he created a bumble profile with new pictures.
- She gives him a compliment by calling him her type. (We thought this was a pwf opener 🤔).
- Followed by “🤤🤤🤤”. This is how subtle women can be. They can bait to sexualize just with a few emojis. This can easily turn sexual with “You too. Especially with that fatass of yours”. Yes, you have the permission to be this crass since you are getting high levels of interest
- She shows more interest by even asking him to text her number again. What better can it get
- A great example of having good hinge prompts and more proof that girls carefully read through profiles
- She sends long texts regarding his preferences of a nice smile, booty and she proves to himself that she definitely fits the criteria he laid out
- She even adds cuddling to the list so she has bit on the sexualizing hook. We all know what happens when you cuddle with a girl
- This is also a result of good text game. Her interest is being rewarded the right way. And he is NOT overtly rewarding her interest. He comes across very succinct and calculated.
- He throws in another hoop for her to jump on how she dances (another way to segue to a close)
- Same story here. She gives him a complement with “Hey handsome”. She subtly throws in a hoop for him to jump through
- He sexualizes on the cue and also adds in “dominant and oral skills”. She hints at good oral skills (baits at sexualizing) being common but doesn’t reveal it. He plays it coy and teases back
- As you can see, he then segues into the meetup with another wine close after another bait to sexualize with “What am I getting myself into with you <smirk>”
In summary, there are four major factors to look for in your texts, to see if a girl is attracted to you. Those are: compliments, long texts / qualifying herself, double texting, and baits to sexualize. Of course, just because a girl does one or more of these things, it doesn’t guarantee she’s totally into you. But, they are a good indicator.
Learning to pick up on these indicators is key to learning how and when to move an interaction forward with a woman. When you visually look at the example interactions above, you should study to make sure you understand how this dynamic works. In none of these did the girl say “Hi, I like you. Instead, it’s about doing the seduction dance that every girl enjoys before meeting someone online.