Guest post by Erik Villalobos
I’d like to talk about my experience with the Red Pill community. Exactly what is the Red Pill? Simply, it’s a community, and it’s also the concept of having a good base knowledge about intersexual dynamics between men & women. So things like dating in today’s competitive sexual marketplace, understanding female psychology, and understanding how men and women perceive each other’s SMV in the sexual marketplace when deciding if they even want to date each other.
What is the Red Pill?
The term “red pill” comes from the movie The Matrix, where Morpheus offers Neo to choose wisely between the blue pill or the red pill. To quote Morpheus, “You take the blue pill, the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill, you stay in wonderland, and I show you how deep the rabbit hole goes.” Many acronyms and terms circulating the internet, like ONEitis, AFC, AF/BB, and Alpha Widow, can be tied back to the Red Pill community. The problem is that a lot of men who find and swallow the Red Pill definitely take it to the extreme, making the rabbit hole go endlessly deeper. I was one of them.
Earlier this year, I discovered “game” through the Playing with Fire community. My mind did a full 360 after being so immersed in the Red Pill community and then coming to the PWF community. I’m still working to remove all of those bad Red Pill beliefs from my head, but already, game has definitely made my perspective toward women much different. For example, I learned to show more empathy towards women. I also learned to show true authentic intent about how I feel when I’m on a date with a girl (“a rule that should not be broken in the Red Pill”).
How the Red Pill Fucked Me Up
From about 2017 to 2019, I consumed so much Red Pill content. I’d read books on it, watch “Red Pill coaches” on YouTube creating content, etc. The more I consumed it, the more anger, fear, resentment, darkness, feelings of hate and suffering, I felt inside. Towards myself, all women, especially my mom, little sister, and my ex-girlfriend at the time. It was a dark spiral.
I even joined a program online on how to train your girlfriend to become a “better quality woman” (crazy I know.) Let me share the kind of advice I was given:
- Make her delete all social media (Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Snapchat, WhatsApp)
- Place a GPS on her phone to track her location
- Install tracking software to see who she was making calls to or texting at the time
I’d have her check in at all times with me, to tell me where she was when she left her home. I’d even make her send a photo of herself to verify if she was lying about where she was. Every time we’d hang out, she had to give me her phone so I could go through and check if she was chatting with someone else, to see if there were any signs of her cheating on me. She wasn’t allowed to give her opinion on something unless I said so. If she were to deny me sex, I would go look for it elsewhere (and I did end up cheating on her with 11 different girls during our relationship). Yup, that’s what the program has you do, to “train your girlfriend” you’re in a serious relationship with.
The Start of My Awakening
I finally had a moment of self realization and clarity. That all these Red Pill coaches, and the rules and theories they preached, were causing me a lot of emotional damage to me. To my inner and outer game, mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually. It wasn’t until I was true with myself that I realized this wasn’t healthy for either of us. So I ended our relationship, told her the honest truth that I had cheated on her, and apologized to her from a place of authenticity with how I mistreated her emotionally inside. She eventually accepted my apology, and we parted ways on good terms.
It took me a while to unplug from all of this Red Pill bullshit and started realizing that it’s nothing but a bunch of whining, angry, bitter men, who have been hurt in the past by their ex girlfriends or wives. They are constantly bitching about how their dating lives suck. That women are evil, all women are bad, hypergamy doesn’t care, feminism this, the west is corrupted, etc. Nothing but complaining, and no fucking solution to it.
I grew frustrated, jaded from it, and finally, I removed myself from it entirely in early 2020. As of writing, I’ve healed somewhat, and I still have some ways to go.
So what have I learned during my awakening? How does Red Pill compare to what the concepts taught by PWF? In Part 2, I’ll discuss the mindsets I’ve discovered from being a part of PWF, and how they differ. Along with why I believe these mindsets are way more valuable than those taught by the Red Pill. Stay tuned!