Indian PE at it again to teach you some more tips on sex. We teach men to get girls they meet on Tinder to come straight over for a “wine date” and fun experience. When a girl does come over, you need to be able to build sexual tension, comfort, and turn her on to be able to close the deal. In this article, we’ll focus on the first part of the equation: sexual tension. So, how do you build tension? Today, I’m going to deepdive into how I build tension on my dates. Both public dates and the classic PWF straight-to-your-home style.

Sexual Escalation with a Woman on Dates

Escalation can be categorized into two types: non-physical and physical. Both are very important skills for you to have.

Non-physical Esclation: This can vary from sex talk or anything light hearted spoken with the right tonality, eye contact, and facial expressions. Basically, you are turning her on with your words, tonality, and body language.

Physical Escalation: A simple touch, gradually increasing in intensity or areas on her body. Example: Thigh -> inner thigh -> shoulder -> back of the neck -> hair brushing and so on.

Building sexual tension is a combination of both of these. It starts off with mostly verbal escalation and minimal physical. Your end goal should be to get it to fully physical escalation when you’re at your place in the bed. Don’t get too carried away with the physical escalation in public because that’s not where you’re going to bang the girl. Too much public physical escalation can easily turn into validation for the girl, which can make it harder for you to close the deal.

With this breakdown in mind, I’ll now give specific examples of each these types of escalations so you guys have a better idea of what these two mean and how you can apply to your dates.

Non-physical Sexual Escalation

  1. Tonality: This is something that needs to be practiced diligently. You can say the most random shit with the right tonality and still make it trigger her sexual emotions/feels. You need to practice thinking about sex with as much intensity as possible in your mind while you say something not at all about sex, like:“I would like to go get some groceries”

“How’s the weather today”

“Do you like cats or dogs?”

Even something as simple as that can be said in a sexual tonality. How do you say it where the girl feels it’s sexual? You slow down every single word and your speech. You say it in your deepest voice. A big factor when it comes to sexual tension is the girl feels comfortable. When you slow down your speech, the girl feels comfortable and her mind doesn’t race all over the place and she’s zoned in to you. Practice this the next time you talk to a girl.

  1. Eye contact: This is an extremely powerful tool when it’s done right. On all my public dates, I’m maintaining strong eye contact about 80% of the time. This builds tension because the girl feels locked in with you and as if she’s part of this bubble you and her created together. One thing to keep in mind though is not have your eyeballs flared up or eyebrows raised, your eyes need to be relaxed and you need to have a smirk when you do so.
  2. Verbal/dirty talk: This requires a bit more experience, but hey! You gotta start somewhere. Right? I personally use dirty talk in terms of asking questions regarding her experience in sex.

“Ever been tied up?”

“Ever been handcuffed?”

“Do you like being choked? Spanked? Having your hair pulled?”

Her answer is totally going to depend upon how you perceive yourself and she sees you. If you come across as a guy who’s very sexual (doing both a & b above), then she will answer without hesitation since she knows you’re not going to judge her

  1. Pauses: Pauses create tension too. Why? Because when there’s a pause, emotions go haywire and the first one who crumbles is the one trying to break the tension. I tend to do these once the girl has gotten comfortable and got over the nerves of a date with a stranger. Make sure you don’t break the silence. If you do, it kills tension, which means you’ll have to build it back up. It may be quite uncomfortable at first to do this but as you keep gaining more experience, this can be another powerful tool.

I personally use a combination of all 3 and sprinkle out when I do this throughout the date. Tension is created from anticipation and unpredictability. If you maintain all these 3 things at all times, there’s a chance the girl might feel a bit uncomfortable and view you strictly as a fuck boy

Physical Sexual Escalation

Physical Escalation in Public

  1. Proximity: This is another great way to get her to experience you without actually experiencing you. When I’m on a date, I always make sure to sit next to her. If I don’t find a table where we can sit next to each other, I tend to get my chair closer to her and just sit there. You will want to aim to lay back and have good proximity without fully being in her face. This again creates anticipation and tension since she is thinking, “Is he going to kiss me?”, “How is the kiss going to be”, etc.. Her emotions will be riled up wanting to find out. When sitting next to her, I sometimes tend to just put my arm on the back of her seat while I’m relaxed. And this is important: with any sign of discomfort, I take a step back and try it again after some comfort and value is built.
  2. Touch: You have to be very calculative and subtle about this. A simple touch on the shoulder, on the leg and gradually increasing to a point where you are brushing her hair behind her ear, etc. This is a great way to break the physical barrier. It personally helped me a lot as a beginner since it can easily tell you where the girl is at. If she is not comfortable with your small touches, then you shouldn’t go to the next step anyway and try again after.

Physical Escalation at Home

  1. Proximity: Whenever I have straight to the house dates, I tend to either move the girl straight to the balcony or to my room depending on her comfort levels. When at the balcony, I stand next to her looking out while moving closer and closer. I find ways to hug her or put my hand on her lower back for 1-2 seconds. Again, breaks the touch barrier and she knows what’s going down without you uttering the words “We shall consummate tonight”.
  2. Hairplay: This instantly puts a lotta girl in a submissive mode. Girls love having their hair pulled. Why? It gives them a feeling that you’re going to be taking control of her body with her head as the first step. Keep in mind to not yank her hair, always grip the root of her hair by grabbing a fistful of it. I typically do this when I’m going for the makeout. You can gauge a girl’s makeout meter by how long she’s holding eye contact with the expression of “Well?”. Grab her around the waist with one hand and pull her close to you as you grip her hair and make out. This is kryptonite for the ladies. This gets them wet to no bounds. Be the first one who stops the makeout. If you let her stop it, you lose since you may fall into a chasing frame after. And as a beginner, you don’t want that.
  3. Neck kisses: When I go for the makeout, after 2-3 kisses, the next step I go for is that I tilt her head to the side and kiss on the side of the neck, up and down her shoulder. This can easily give her goosebumps and increase her heart rate (in a good way ;)). When you do these 2 combinations, again! Be the one who stops it. And make it seem like nothing special happened and continue the conversation without any change in your tonality.
  4. Grabbing the culo: If she’s giving a greenlight for the above two, I go grabbing the booty without any hesitation. I even comment on it when I grab it tight. I even give a light spank from outside her dress. This shows dominance, and since most girls love being spanked, she will be turned on without fail. If she’s wearing a dress, I even tend to ask her to turn around and show her booty. I lift the dress up ever so slightly and then give another spank “Mmm. Can it handle a good spanking?”
  5. Lead to the bedroom: If you’re doing this on the balcony/couch/living room, the next step is to lead her to the bedroom just by uttering the simple words “Come with me”. In the room after all the above steps have been achieved, I use a combination of all and the clothes come off. You have to be dominant and not be timid when you’re doing this. She’d be able to smell that you’re not experienced and instantly be turned off and/or give you a logical objection like “Wait. I’m not that kind of girl”
  6. Lifting her up: This is a true dominant move and I’ve noticed girls are turned on like a switch when this is done right. If you workout and go to the gym, this shouldn’t be too hard. I typically lift the girl up while making out, make out more, move her closer to the bed and throw her on it. BOOM! She’s going to be wet.
  7. Bed escalation: If you’ve done all this right, assuming that she’s quite comfortable with all this, I start off with neck kisses, and alternating between kissing her lips. While I’m on top of her, I tend to caress her legs and gradually move to the inner thighs. Tease her a bit without touching her panties and continuing making out.
  8. Nipple stimulation: Once the clothes come off, I go for kissing on her nipples – I give extra attention to these since most girls actually feel a tingle down there as you do this. I do a combination of biting, squeezing, gripping the tits and show some extra care and passion when I do so.

All of the above are amazing ways to turn a girl on. The obvious next step is caressing her clit from outside her panties. Stay tuned for part 2 of my series on foreplay, where I’ll break down my techniques for this 😉

4 Tension Killers to Avoid When Escalating

There’s a few things that kill tension faster than Usain bolt. You have to make sure you avoid these

  1. Nervous laughter: Stay away from this at all costs. Be aware that you might do this when you’re not comfortable in a situation. When girls hear this laughter, they can easily tell that you don’t have enough experience with her caliber of women and you lose confidence points.
  2. Breaking Pauses: Breaking pauses when she’s still not feeling comfortable can be good since she gets more and more familiar with you and your vibe. But, once she’s comfortable and the tension starts building, keep holding pauses to at least 80%. This will get her to invest and make conversation since she’s going to feel nervous otherwise.
  3. Talking too much: Dates are meant for the girl talking her ear off…till a certain point. When you talk more than her, she loses interest. Especially when it’s too logical and platonic. Girls don’t tend to listen when you’re talking about informational stuff about you since they don’t really care until they’re fully invested post sex. If you talk too much, she’s going to try to focus on what you’re saying and this will work against you when you’re building tension. You can go on rants here and there but keep your answers short and succinct when you’re asked a question.
  4. Rapid movements: This is another sign of nervousness and women reflect it much more if you’re the one who’s feeling nervous. You’re supposed to be the grounding energy she can look to. When you’re laid back and relaxed, you need to focus on making slow movements no matter what you do with your body.

Get to Sex by Building Sexual Tension

Creating sexual tension is a key skill for guys to learn. By creating sexual tension, you can turn a woman on and give her the experience she craves that leads to sex. Without being able to do this, you’ll find it very hard to have sex consistently with women.

Practice the above techniques. As you build up experience, you’ll find it easier and easier to turn a girl on. When I started off, I would keep these in mind and gradually increase reference experiences. Now, I feel comfortable using these to build sexual tension with all types of girls.

Hope that helps,
Indian PE

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